第十九章（第2/13页）

"Read it!" said the sepulchral voice.

“读吧！”还是那鬼魅般的声音。

"Why, if it's a letter from her ladyship, I'm sure her ladyship wouldn't want me to read her letter to you, Sir Clifford. You can tell me what she says, if you wish.” "Read it!" repeated the voice.

“哎呀，要是夫人来的信，我相信她不会愿意我担任读信的角色，克利福德爵士。如果您愿意的话，不妨告诉我其中的内容。”“读吧！”那声音再次响起。

"Why, if I must, I do it to obey you, Sir Clifford," she said. And she read the letter.

“呃，您非要我读的话，我只好从命，克利福德爵士。”她说。她读完了康妮的来信。

"Well, I am surprised at her ladyship," she said. "She promised so faithfully she'd come back!” The face in the bed seemed to deepen its expression of wild, but motionless distraction. Mrs. Bolton looked at it and was worried. She knew what she was up against: male hysteria. She had not nursed soldiers without learning something about that very unpleasant disease.

“唉，夫人的做法真让我惊讶。”她说。“她曾经那样坚定，信誓旦旦地说会回到您身边！”那塑像般凝注的面孔变得更加狂乱，更加心神不宁。博尔顿太太目睹这一切，心里担心不已。她已经明晰自己将要面对怎样的状况：歇斯底里的男人。她以前照料伤兵的时候，就曾对这种狂躁的癔病略知一二。

She was a little impatient of Sir Clifford. Any man in his senses must have known his wife was in love with somebody else, and was going to leave him. Even, she was sure, Sir Clifford was inwardly absolutely aware of it, only he wouldn't admit it to himself. If he would have admitted it, and prepared himself for it: or if he would have admitted it, and actively struggled with his wife against it: that would have been acting like a man. But no! he knew it, and all the time tried to kid himself it wasn't so.

她渐渐对克利福德失去耐心。只要头脑清醒，任何男人都会清楚自己的妻子已经爱上别人，将要弃他而去。当然，她也晓得，其实克利福德心里如同明镜一般，只是不愿向自己承认而已。如果他早点承认现实，早些做好准备，或者积极行动起来，尽量避免这种情况的发生，那样做才像是大丈夫所为。但他恰恰相反！他心里比谁都明白，却总在欺哄自己，说事实并非如此。

He felt the devil twisting his tail, and pretended it was the angels smiling on him. This state of falsity had now brought on that crisis of falsity and dislocation, hysteria, which is a form of insanity. "It comes", she thought to herself, hating him a little, "because he always thinks of himself. He's so wrapped up in his own immortal self, that when he does get a shock he's like a mummy tangled in its own bandages. Look at him!” But hysteria is dangerous: and she was a nurse, it was her duty to pull him out. Any attempt to rouse his manhood and his pride would only make him worse: for his manhood was dead, temporarily if not finally. He would only squirm softer and softer, like a worm, and become more dislocated.

他清楚恶魔已经翘起尾巴，却假装是天使在朝他微笑。如今，他的伪善终于引发了危机，造成无法挽回的混乱局面，陷入了歇斯底里，近似癫狂的精神状态。“该来的总会来，”她心里恨恨地想，“因为他只想着自己。他全身心沉浸在不朽的自我意识中，而遭遇重创时，他就像个木乃伊，将自己紧紧裹在绷带里。看看他那副德行！”但这种狂躁的癔病终归是危险的，既然她扮演着看护的角色，就有责任帮他渡过难关。试图激起他的丈夫气概和自尊心，只会让情况变得更糟。因为他的男子气概早已丧失殆尽，即使并非永久消失，至少现在半点也看不出。他只会像只虫子，不停地蠕动，越变越软，情况则会变得更加无法收拾。

The only thing was to release his self-pity. Like the lady in Tennyson, he must weep or he must die.

唯一的办法就是让他释放出自怜的情感。就像丁尼生（注：1809-1892，英国诗人）笔下的贵妇，要么痛快哭一场，要么干脆活不成。

So Mrs. Bolton began to weep first. She covered her face with her hand and burst into little wild sobs. "I would never have believed it of her ladyship, I wouldn't!” She wept, suddenly summoning up all her old grief and sense of woe, and weeping the tears of her own bitter chagrin. Once she started, her weeping was genuine enough, for she had had something to weep for.

拿定主意，博尔顿太太自己先掉下泪来。她只手掩面，呜咽起来。“我真没想到夫人能如此绝情，真的无法相信！”她抽泣着，旧日的种种忧伤悲苦瞬间涌上心头，她的泪水为自己的不幸过往而流。一旦抽搭起来，便是如泣如诉，肝肠寸断，因为她确有悲切的理由。